


Brewing Up Disaster

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-31
Updated: 2009-08-10
Packaged: 2019-01-19 23:44:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12420666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: When Lily Evans makes a love potion for her long-time crush only to have James Potter drink it, things start to get chaotic with disastrous consequences.  LJ Rated for snogging, swearing, and seriously bad judgment...





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

  
Author's notes: 1  


* * *

                                   **B R E W I N G   U P   D I S A S T E R**

                                           A Lily and James Tale

                                                     **Chapter 1:**

                                                      Prologue

                                                           or

                                                  In Which Lily… 

                                  Goes Against her Better Judgement

                                                      …oo0oo…

"I don't know, Sev," I said doubtfully, flipping through my copy of Advanced Potion-Making. "I just don't think that it's any of our business. And try crushing that, would you? You're going to impale someone."

My friend paused, pressing down on the sulfurous been pod with the side of his dagger, and taking a moment to watch the juices leak out before making a hastily scrawled note in his own book. "Lily, I am serious; something is going on with those Marauders. They're up to no good!"

"They're always up to no good," I mumbled, but took the chance to look at the group in question; James Potter and Sirius Black were proudly grinning at their smoking, spitting cauldron while Remus Lupin, my fellow Prefect, tried to minimize the damage Peter Pettigrew had brought to their own creation. 

"There'll be a full moon in a few days," Severus muttered darkly, adding the bean juice as I stirred, "Want to bet Lupin's grandmother will suddenly fall ill again?"

"Stop!" I hissed angrily. "You are becoming obsessed with this! Remus is a good person - not like Potter or even Black. Can't you just leave him alone?"

I could tell he was about to make an angry retort of his own, but was cut off as the Professor reached our table. 

"Oho!" Horace Slughorn beamed at me. "What's this, Evans?"

"We're almost finished, sir," I said, trying to smile. "Just the last ingredient-"

"Very good! And did you - is that a clockwise stir you're adding? How very curious… although it does seem to be helping…"

"It was Severus' idea."

Slughorn patted my table partner on the back with a beefy hand, making Sev's weak frame buckle forward. "A lovely addition, my boy. You two always produce quite excellent work while together."

He smiled at us vaguely, peered once more into the cauldron, then moved on to critique Potter's Draught of Living Death Disaster.

"Good job, Lily." I turned from a smiling Severus to meet the gaze of David Felch, the attractive, fair-haired Ravenclaw sitting behind me. "You're very talented with this potion stuff."

His white teeth disarmed me; when had David ever spoken a word in my direction, much less to pay a compliment? I had only fancied him for the past four years… "Thanks," I managed, playing with the red hair that had fallen into my eyes. "That's very kind of you to say."

He nodded politely and struck up conversation with his partner. I hastily turned back to face my bubbling Draught, hoping that no one else could see my burning cheeks. 

As if by coincidence, the potions book I had been flipping through with disinterest had fallen open to a page I hadn't seen before. Gracing the top of the yellowing paper in an old-fashioned, loopy font read "Love Potions…"

I slammed my book shut just as Slughorn returned to the front of the room.

"Yes, yes, well done, everyone! Time is up, but I have the pleasure of reporting that two of your classmates have made a successful potion-"

There were groans from all around the room. I sank lower in my chair, feeling the familiar heat in my face as I blushed. Everyone in our year had a pretty good idea who the best potions students were. Slughorn never shut up about us. 

"Severus Snape and Lily Evans!" The Professor nodded in our direction encouragingly, prompting a round of dim applause, and I put on an approximation of a smile. "You both have the honor of receiving one bottle of Felix Felicis, which, as I'm sure you all know if you completed last night's essay, is liquid luck…" 

I stared at the vial of golden liquid sitting in my palm.

Huh. 

                                                    …oo0oo…

"So what are you going to do with it, Lily? It's gotta be very valuable…"

"Could I, er, borrow a drop for my Transfiguration test tomorrow? Just a bit, it wouldn't be cheating-"

"You are so lucky!"

"How much do you want for it?"

I slipped the tiny bottle back into the pocket of my robes, suddenly worried about its safety. I had good reason to be when I saw the four pairs of eyes keep a close watch on my actions. "Sorry. It isn't for sale."

I was sitting in the Common Room, surrounded by my roommates: Mary Macdonald, Emma Vale, Alice Prewett and Isabelle Griffin. I loved them all dearly, but Felix Felicis was just a little too good to part with. 

"We understand," Mary smiled at me, then elbowed a wistful Izzy in the ribs. "Don't we? Lily earned the prize, fair and square. We wouldn't be good friends if we took it from her."

"Right," Emma agreed firmly. "Lily gets to use it how she pleases. I'm going down to dinner. You lot coming?"

"I'll be down in a second," I replied hesitantly, staring at the fireplace. "Save me a seat, would you?"

"Of course. Come on, Isabelle, we're leaving."

They all left the room except for Alice, who smiled at me warmly. "Congratulations, Lily! I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you. I feel like I don't deserve all the attention, though. Every student should get a reward…"

"Maybe, but if that were true, it wouldn't be as special." She sat beside me, and her expression was so honest, it was difficult not to take her words to heart. "Lily, if anyone deserves a little extra luck, you're the sole person who comes to mind. You are constantly helping others - I think you deserve to be a bit selfish."

She squeezed my arm and left through the portrait hole, probably meaning how I introduced her to her longtime boyfriend, Frank Longbottom. Admittedly, they were perfect together…

At the word perfect, my mind automatically drifted to David again. I had wanted him for so long… and maybe I did deserve to be a little selfish… he had finally noticed me. But was it enough? Would he eventually grow to love me back on his own? 

You need luck, my mind whispered. You need luck, and a whole lot of help…

Love Potions for the Desperate at Heart.

I grabbed the book from my bag, and, after making sure no one was watching, quickly flipped to page 77.

So many different recipes caught my eye. I saw instructions for the infamous Amortentia, but quickly ruled that out because it was too powerful. If I was going to do this - and the Prefect part of me still couldn't believe that I was - it would have to be mild. Just enough for a crush, so that David could come to the rest on his own. 

And then, just when I had almost convinced myself to give up, I found it.

Quereramor: coming from the Spanish verb querer (to want) and noun amor (love), this love potion was originally created in Spain several centuries ago. The result influences the drinker to constantly dream of the man or woman who brewed it, enabling a subconscious desire and longing. Within two-five days, the drinker will acknowledge their affections and act upon them. Quereramor (care-rare-a-more) is the easiest of all known love potions to make…

I swallowed. Hard. 

                                                       …oo0oo…

**AN: So? What did you think? This is just the prologue, and all the real action starts in the next chapter. Should have that up by tomorrow, if I'm lucky. If you had the time, I would appreciate a review, but if not… thanks for reading! :)**


	2. Keep Your Enemies Closer (Wait...)

**B R E W I N G U P D I S A S T E R**  
A Lily and James Tale

**Chapter 2:**  
Keep Your Enemies Closer  
(Wait, Who Said We Were Enemies?)

or

In Which Lily  
Does Things She Will Regret

.oo0oo.

It was at the Prefect meeting where I started to get really nervous.

"And one more thing before we let you lot go," said the Head Boy, Brian, smiling kindly at us and somehow making me uncomfortable with foreboding.  "Only a month or so until Lisa and I graduate," he gestured toward the bubbly-blonde Head Girl, "so those hoping to inherit our positions, _Lily_ , should make a shining impression on the Professors. We already have an idea of who we're going to recommend to Dumbledore, but it couldn't hurt to take on extra duties to prove your dedication. Have a great week. You're all dismissed."

I sat quietly in my chair while the students next to me shuffled papers, gathering their things.

I had only dreamed of becoming Head Girl since I was eleven years old. It was the biggest student responsibility available, but there was something so... professional and comforting about those shiny badges pinned to your robe front.

But what if I jeopardized the very thing I had worked so hard for by making this stupid potion? Knowing me, I would get caught because I can't keep anything a secret. Then what would they do? Maybe I would be stuck with a lifetime of detention, or they would... gulp. Expel me.

Someone tapped my shoulder and I slowly turned to face Remus Lupin. "You okay, Lily?"

I blinked at him. "Do you think I'm going to get Head Girl?"

When I was younger, I'd had this huge, gaping crush on Remus, but don't you dare tell anyone. I've gotten over it, and now he's my friend. I'm not going to ruin that by admitting something from the past.

"Yeah." He looked at me with concern, and it felt as though the slip of parchment that now represented my future (or something less dramatic than that) seemed to burn a hole in my pocket. "Yeah, I do. And so does everyone else.  You heard Brian and Lisa; they are practically welcoming you to take their place."

I fiddled with my hands. It wasn"t worth it. It really couldn"t be worth it. David Felch was a silly boy that I cared about. It wasn't fair to make him have false feelings for me, and I wasn't ready to sacrifice my long-term goal for something that wouldn't be real.

It had just been a really, really bad idea.

"Right." I sighed, gathered my books and stood. "Let's go."

.oo0oo.

I didn't really talk much during dinner. Mary and Alice were giggling excitedly over something Frank had done, and I didn't have the energy to listen to Isabelle's speech on how she deserved the Felix. Emma was really the only one who understood I was preoccupied with my thoughts, and faithfully handed me the butter without comment whenever I asked.

Mary gasped, poking my arm. Her cheeks were flushed, and her joy-filled eyes were darting back and forth. "Liiily, James Potter is staring at you again!"

I'll never understand how that boy's mind works.

I stole a glance down the table, and there he was: messy black hair, circular glasses crooked on the edge of his nose, and a wide grin. Whenever James Potter looks that happy, it's usually a good time to become suspicious.

"I'll be right back," I told my friends slowly before walking down to the end of the table 'The Marauders' had dubbed as their own.

Potter greeted me as he always does: "Ready for our date this weekend, Evans? Two o'clock at The Three Broomsticks, Butterbeers on me."

I gritted my teeth. "Unfortunately, I have prior engagements. Then and every other day of my life."

Peter Pettigrew snickered from his place on the opposite bench. Remus took a calm sip of pumpkin juice.

"So," I said conversationally, smiling without warmth and taking a seat.  "What are you troublemakers planning now?"

Pettigrew, who had still been getting over his fit of laughter, immediately choked on his chicken leg. Potter's voice was far too innocent when he loftily replied, "Why, Lily darling, I have no idea what you could possibly mean."

"Why isn't Black eating with you, then?"

"Who?"

" _Sirius bloody Black!_ Your best mate?"

"No need for such language. See, there was this disastrous incident with some bad eggs-"

"Don't lie to me!" I said angrily, and my face felt uncomfortably warm.  "I'm not stupid. Rounds are at ten, Remus."

As I got up to leave, Potter said, "Wait, Lily, I-"

"For the last time, Potter, I'm not going out with you!"

And with some people staring in confusion, I stalked out of the Dining Hall, having no explanation for why I was suddenly so furious.

.oo0oo.

I was left to do rounds on my own, as Remus had fallen critically ill and was resting in the Hospital Wing (or at least, that's what Professor Dumbledore had said in his excused absence note). Brian and Lisa told me there wasn't time to find a replacement on such short notice, so this was "a splendid opportunity to prove my capabilities!"

Whatever.

Hogwarts castle is a bit eerie at night.  I've never really grown used to the shadowed suits of armor and portraits that watch your journey through each corridor. We've all heard about the hidden passageways and trick stairs, and once I even stumbled across a room that had vanished the next day. The place is a school of magic - a fact we're constantly reminded of.

Rounds usually consist of just checking the more popular broom closets for snogging couples and stragglers pushing curfew. Actually finding someone, though, is rarer than you would expect.

I sighed as I turned another corner. This night was turning out to be as exciting as mos-

"Merlin!"

"OUCH! Bloody - okay, Evans, it's just me, you can lower that wand!"

Shaking, I got to my feet and put away the wand as told, but glared at Sirius Black, his form sprawled across the ground. "What did you do?!"

"Ugh, I just crashed into you. What part of that head bang did you miss?"

"Don't get smart with me! Whenever you and your friends are out of bed, it means a big prank is in store."

Black reached for the two packets of parchment that had gone flying when we collided. One had some words at the top that I only just saw ("Moony" and "Map" if I read them correctly) and figures that I swear were moving- The other was a worn scrap that had clearly been opened and folded up again multiple times. Black unrolled the page just as I realized-

"That's - oh, that's mine, give it back, please, _please_!!"

I lunged, but Black was already on his feet, holding it out of reach. A large smirk took over his entire face. I was soo in for it, now.

"A love potion, Evans? Really? Who's the lucky bloke? Anyone I know?"

"No- I-" I jumped feebly, but was several inches too short. Black's gray eyes glinted with dangerous excitement. "It _was_ for David Felch in Ravenclaw, but I've decided not to use it! Really, now please give it to me-"

He dropped the paper in my eagerly waiting hands after rolling his eyes. "Evans, you're too goody-goody for your own good."

Venomously, I snapped, "At least I can think of synonyms for 'good', idiot."

Black took it in stride. " _Good_ for you, smart arse, but do you ever have any fun?"

"Drugging people isn't fun! In fact, I think I can safely say that it's illegal-!"

"Lily," he put an arm around my shoulder that I had no success in shaking off, "I'm going to help you get this bloke of your dreams. Dimwit is going to fall in love with you in no time."

I was so startled, I didn't notice his calculating expression. "His name is David, not Dimwit. And how could you help me?"

"In reality," Sirius Black said with ease, "I'm merely encouraging you to go through with what you had originally planned..."

He tapped the potion recipe resting in my palm, and I felt my eyes go wide.

.oo0oo.

"An invisibility cloak? That was your 'secret weapon'? _An invisibility cloak_?! Where in Merlin's name did you get this?! I've never seen-"

"Shh, Lily, I'm borrowing it from a friend. But it really defeats the purpose of not being seen when you're screaming loud enough to wake Hogsmeade!"

"Right. Sorry."

It was safe to say that things were going well. Sirius and I tiptoed down to the closet where (Slughorn had carelessly let it slip,) all the potions ingredients were stored outside the classroom.

"I don't think I can do this," I whispered. "It's horrible, and I don't know how you ever managed to convince me, Sirius, but I'm turning back right now."

"This is for love," my partner-in-crime growled, and if I had been in a sane frame of mind, I would have noticed how strangely he was behaving. "People sacrifice all sorts of morals for love. No one will hold you against it, as long as you grab those ingredients quickly, without being seen...!"

I took a deep breath before casting the non-verbal Alohamora.

.ooo0oo.

An hour later, and the potion was done.

We were squatting in an abandoned broom closet that Sirius had somehow known about (he tried to hide it, but I could see him looking at that Moony Map of his), and had transfigured a semi-working cauldron. Transfiguration has never been my strong suit, but Potions, however... Well, let's just say that the book wasn't exaggerating when it labeled Quereramor as simple.

Sirius watched while I poured the pinkish liquid into a vial, placing it in my pocket next to the Felix Felicis that still rattled inside. I hadn't taken a single sip of luck, and everything still seemed to be going without a hitch. Hopefully, I wouldn't even need the stuff tomorrow.

"So that's that." I nodded tiredly at my... _accomplice's_ statement, rubbing my eyes.  "You did good, Evans."

"The Quereramor is done," I tentatively agreed, "But I have no idea how I'm going to get it all the way over to the Ravenclaw table..."

"Ah, but you're forgetting: we have a lovely prank planned for tomorrow." He grinned at me fiendishly and I drew my wand.

"Ah, but _you're_ forgetting: I'm a Prefect, and since you just admitted to whatever it is that is going to happen, I have the right to give you detention."

He rolled his eyes in the dim wandlight and stood, opening the door back to the corridor. "And I just helped you brew an illegal love potion. We're at an impasse, Lily - I won't say anything if you don't. Besides, the prank will help Dim-boy get his special morning drink."

"Ravenclaws are hardly 'dim', so why don't you just-"

He laughed as we headed back to Gryffindor Tower under the invisibility cloak.

.oo0oo.

**AN: So that's that, I suppose! :D**

**Now, I swore to myself that I wouldn't be one of those people that constantly begs for reviews, but I still love to hear what you think. I got some very, very awesome comments last time, and I appreciate it very much.  Thank you for reading!!**


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